My Imaginary Conversation With The Pediatrician

PB got her first round of shots Friday. She's doing great and is growing like a weed. She's gained exactly five pounds since she'sbeen born. I'm still in shock over having this little thing to care for and time is flying by faster than ever.
Even with all my tattoos and the piercings I've gotten over the years I'm pretty scared of a hypodermic needle. I can't stand getting jabbed or injected or getting my blood taken. It creeps me out.
That being said, I was quite fearful for my own spawn to have to go through any of it. I asked everyone the same questions several times in every way I could think of. "Is it going to make her sick? Will she be in pain? What can I do to make it all better?" I even looked into an alternative vaccination schedule. Anything to ease my precious bundle of joy's suffering.
Everyone was great about my questions. Thank you family for letting me fuss and flutter in your ears while making absolutely no sense whatsoever. And the nurses too. Amazing women. Really. Everyone understood my fears. Our nurse on Friday even told me stories about her children to put my fears to rest.
The doctor was a different story altogether. She was just dense. I understand she deals with crazy mothers all day long but sometimes you just need a little humor in your life. So my imaginary conversation went a little like this:
Me: "doctor, do you have children of your own?"
Doctor: "no." Said with a look that says she got some ick in her mouth.
Me: "why is that? You work with children, wouldn't you want some of your own?"
Doctor: "have children? I'm a doctor. I'm too busy for children." At this point she's acquired a Russian accent like the Santa Claus in Rise of the Guardians.
Of course the fictional conversation ends there and my mind wanders off to wonder if maybe I need to pick up a couple more kids movies since I seem to relate quite a bit of my interactions to this particular movie. PB gets such a kick out of it that I put it on and forget to turn it off. A lot.
For anyone wondering, PB did great with her shots. The oral vaccine on the other hand pissed her off for about a whole minute. That's a lot of time in baby minutes. She's been pretty tired the last couple days but nothing too bad. My worrying was for nothing and a giant waste of energy.

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