Late Night Rambles

I don't sleep well at night. Maybe it has something to do with me not being able to get up in the morning or maybe I can't get up in the morning because I don't sleep well at night. I usually go to bed with him but I can never seem to go to sleep. I always seem to lay awake listening to him snore. Man, he seems to sleep so soundly and goes to sleep so effortlessly. I laid beside him tonight after I had taken a long hot shower until I knew for sure he was sound asleep. I wanted to write. I wanted a cigarette. I wanted another drink. When I got out of bed I checked on the little one then put on the clothes I was wearing earlier. Honestly, I've been wearing them for a couple days. They're pretty dirty but I just don't care sometimes. I need to do laundry tomorrow. I miss my washer and dryer. I could be doing laundry right now instead of having to wait until everything fits perfectly into a schedule. I hear my neighbors running up the stairs in the apartment behind ours. Earlier they were fighting yet again. Holly wants to go to bed but she won't go without me so she's making a point of wandering in front of me as much as possible. As if I'd forget she's there. I can hear my husband, still snoring, in our bed upstairs. He works pretty damn hard and loves us so very much. He really is a good man and will one day become the great man he wants to be. His lunch is set up for the morning and all he has to do for coffee is turn on the machine when his alarm goes off. I sit in the semi dark, wondering what I forgot to do. There reaally isn't anything pressing but it is what I worry about most. i think I'll have that one last drink and cigarette and try to get some rest. Today is ended and tomorrow is the start of a new day.